Winner's Circle

2011-05-17T23:56:00.001-04:00

My sleep pattern has always been off. But as of let it's beyond off. I'm jealous of people that say they're asleep by 10. To be honest if I could be asleep by 12 I would be happy. And it's not just the falling asleep part but the staying asleep too. Like I'll finally fall asleep and then wake up several times. And well once I wake up the cycle starts again. It takes forever to get back to sleep and then bam up again. *sigh* So if anyone has any suggestions to help send them my way.

In other news I'm looking forward to exploring soon. Heading out in the warm weather, enjoying the outdoors. Oh how I've missed being out and about.

Reach for the stars..... Xoxo

What to do.....

2011-05-16T22:21:00.001-04:00

So it's been way too long since I've updated. I feel like starting from scratch. But I'm not sure. There are things I've been working on and things I've scrapped. Long story short my mind is on the go and my motivation is in full bloom. I think I'll keep this blog for personal entries but will be setting up something on the side for my creative ideas, ventures, etc. And of course I have my Tumblr, both personal and health/exercise one. Anywho I'm back. I'm on a roll and I hope you'll come along for the ride.......

Xoxo

Bcak On Track

2010-06-16T18:41:00.002-04:00

So I've been hitting the gym for the month and a half. At first it was tiring and a task but now everyday I go the more I wanna go. The more I wanna push harder and do more. I started off doing 2-3 days, now I go 4-5. I do think I need a personal trainer though. For at least a few months to get me on the track I want to be at. I just have to budget for one. And that's another thing, I mean to each their own but when I see people with PTs and not taking advantage of them I get confused. Like why bother? Why pay all this money for a PT to sit there and talk or not even try when you workout? Shit if I had a PT I'd be like dude the only thing I wanna hear from you is how many reps and what I need to do. I would go OD hard lol. I'm sure I probably won't get a PT though. I've been just reading and watching videos, looking up info on my own to plan my own routine. It's fun (never thought I'd say that) and I'm learning a lot about my body.

In other news I went and interviewed for a position on Thursday, got it and had to turn it down because it didn't pay enough *sadface* Ugh this is getting aggravating. And yes I am happy I do have a job and I know I'm blessed to be working but I'm just so through with it. Won't let that stop me though... nope. But yeah if you know anyone hiring give them my resume ;) lol

2010-05-27T13:42:00.001-04:00

So I've been going to the gym & loving it. When I feel tired & down I head in jump on the treadmill and after awhile I'm in a better mood & full of energy. I usually go Tues & Thurs before work, Wed after work and one day on the weekend. I wish I could go everyday but my schedule doesn't permit it now.

Anywho I was there this morning & some dudes were working out together. They're in pretty decent shape & they were motivating each other. Well they really got into it. Like crazy into it. So they're all grunting & high fiving and all that manly stuff lol. See that's what I need, someone to motivate me, where we can push each other. My brother J is going with me Sat morning. I only wish he'd always go with me. He's a great motivation for me. But in the meantime I'll still go and push myself.
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2010-05-25T17:15:00.002-04:00

Wow it's been a long time since my last post. Truth be told I miss blogging. But I have little time and when I do have time I can't put my thoughts in order. As you'll probably be able to tell from this post. I do need to blog again... somewhere. Because I've realized that when I don't do so I don't vent and I hold too much in. With that being said I won't be making this an ultra depressing blog or anything but there will be times I might post some sad shit because hey I'm human and well it's my blog and I can post whatever the eff makes me happy (or sad). So yeah just giving you the heads up. I have been blogging snippets here and there on Tumblr but I don't really consider it blogging. It's just random thoughts I throw out. And while I've consider going back to LJ, which I might for more of my personal entries I think for the most part this will be my main spot. So kiddies (if anyone's still around) you guys will be blessed once again with my randomness.

Anywho I'm shooting this off real quick from work. As most of you know this job bores me to tears. I'm having an up and down day today. I'm down because it's the anniversary of my grandfather's death and because the it's my niece birthday and I can't see her. I haven't seen her in over 6 months because of her bitchass mother and my spineless brother. But otherwise I worked out (yeah I'm back on my gym mood) and am feeling pretty darn good. Anyways I'm gonna wrap this up, this McLazy ass has me in a bad mood. But I'll be back soon, for real this time.

Happy Friday

2009-09-25T09:33:00.000-04:00

Hello out there ladies and gents. Welcome and Happy Friday! The week flew as has the year. Well to me anyways. The holidays are around the corner and the new year is upon us. I don't know if it's just me but it seems that the older I get the faster the calendar goes by. *sigh*

Anyways moving along. I think we have the hosue we're moving into secured. Dave spoke to the landlord last night and told him he's taking some money to him either tonight or tomorrow. I'm too excited. If all goes well we'll be moved in by Nov. And altough I hate moving I'm really looking forward to this move :)

So what are all you fab people doing this weekend? Well yesterday was Sonny's bday so the weekend is his. We're going to the movies, having a family get together and singing happy birthday. I know I said I was going to post to BW but I don't know if time will aloow it. Let's see what happens. Well I hope you all have a great one.

Xoxo

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2009-09-18T08:52:00.001-04:00

Hello ladies and gents. I hope everyone is doing great. I've been MIA I know. Truth be told I've been MIA on all my blogs other than Tumblr. I don't write much there. I don't know I don't feel comfortable doing so. But I do need to start blogging again cause I miss it. And it's the way I organized my thoughts. I want to update at least weekly. On all my blogs.

Anywhos I was suppose to have my site up and running but ran into some difficulties with the girl working on my site. So it's scratched. I have nada. I just really learn this on my own *sigh* But I have no time. So if anyone wants to give me pointers or point me to a site where I can learn web design/coding/etc let me know. Speaking of sites Beauty Whore is still up but neglected by me. I do have pics to upload and some reviews but just been caught up. I should have a few pieces up by next weekend. I should just sit down and knock it out tonight but eh I don't know.
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Why Hello There....

2009-08-11T12:42:00.000-04:00

Wow it's been quite some time since I've updated here. Just going through one of my ruts. It happens. Truth be told other than Tumblr I haven't updated nada. *gasp* I know I know I have to get on it. But in all honesty I've just been going through some things. And rather than sit and write/make a video about how bad things are I rather just work through them and then come post some fun positive things.

I have a week off next week. So I'll be doing some makeup looks I've been working on in my head. Blues and greens and such. You can check them over at Beauty-Whore once I'm done. Sadly even makeup has taken a back seat. *sigh*

I hope to slowly catch up and comment on everyone's blogs. And hopefully stay active.

Xoxo

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Personal Space

2009-06-04T13:18:00.000-04:00

When did it become ok for people to just invade your personal space? To hover over you and touch or feel you? I was at an appointment yesterday when the lady helping grabbed my wrist to look at my tattoo. I was like wtf? And pulled away. She was like I wanna look at your tattoo, ok but you don't just grab someone. And besides my shit ain't even healed yet and she's all grabbing. Smh I wanted to drop kick her. Also people when you see pregnent women don't run up and cop a feel on the belly if you don't know them. People use to try this whenever I was preggos. Um no, back off. Like where do people get the idea it's fine to do these things. Look I let those I want feel me up and it ain't many people. So moral of the story kids is don't invade my space unless you want to be dropped. Just a warning for those of you out there that like to be touchy feely.
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Random Rant

2009-05-19T13:23:00.000-04:00

Feel free to continue on or not. I have to rant because people are so aggravating. There are a few things that annoy me to no end. Like liars, people with no goals/ambitions to name a few.

Well another thing that annoys me to no end is greedy people. People who are greedy with food is such a turn off. I can't stand it. You haven't gotten done eating what you have in front of you and you're plotting on the next 3 plates you wanna eat. Don't get me wrong I've sat down to eat and been like dayum this mac n cheese is the bomb.com and I want seconds. I'm sure we all have, that's not what gets me. What I hate is people who done loaded their plate with food, got seconds before some people even got their first helping, and are sitting there plotting to eat half of the darn cake too. Then wanna complain that they sick to their stomach or can't loose weight. Why? Cause you're greedy! And half the time they toss out the food because they so sick they can't eat it! See someone else could have tamed their hunger with that but your greedy arse wanted to load up on everything like there's no tomorrow. Or how about this one. Someone bought everyone in the office little boxes filled with I don't know what cause mine is sitting there closed. Well ol McGreedy opened hers up and devoured it. Then came to my desk and asked if I opened mine. I said no. Do you believe she stood there waiting for me to open my box. I said I'm not opening it till I'm home. She still stood there for like 5 more minutes!!! Greedy I tell you. Ugh. Ok just had to get that out.

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Time Flies...

2009-05-19T00:28:00.000-04:00

It's been a month since I last spoke to my dad. I month since he went and did what he did. Wow...... Already? It seems like yesterday. The pain is still so fresh.

It's been about 8 months since I've seen my niece. My brother's girlfriend is ignorant and doesn't like me. I've ask my brother repeatedly to bring her to my house and nada. She'll be 2 on May 25th and I've mossed so much.

It's been almost 4 years since my grandpa passed away. May 25 will be 4 years since my heart broke. Since I felt myself fall to pieces. I still break down in tears. I still miss him so much. They say time heals.... I guess I need more time.

Time flies and I don't know where to. People change, places change and yet it's all the same.

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Weekend Recap

2009-05-11T11:50:00.000-04:00

I hope everyone had a lovely weekend. I did, well my weekend was a bit crazy truth be told. Friday I did Ashley's makeup for prom, she looked so beautiful. And then I did Yesenia's makeup later that night. I missed seeing my brother dressed up but his friend's dad took loads of pics for me. My cousins who I hadn't seen in a bit came over.

My brother told me he's enlisting in the Marines. I'm torn about this. I support all his decsions and understand why he wants to go but I don't want my baby brother in Iraq somewhere. He intually was gonna take the test and if he passed head off to boot camp a few days after graduation. But I spoke to him and asked him to stay for the summer, work and if he still wanted to enlist come fall then I will be fine and support him. So he just texted me and said he spoke to his recruiter and he's staying the summer. My cousin Nick was going to go in with him but since Nick has his GED he can't enlist in the Marines without a certain amount of college credits. So Nick is gonna head to the Army. Again I'm torn but I respect their decesions.

Mother's day was lovely. Spent it at my abuela's. We had a cookout and it was also my mom's birthday. The boys gave me nice gifts.

Well ladies and gents I'm a bit hungry. Gonna grab some soup. Have a fabulous day.

Ciao
Xoxo

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Weekend is Here :)

2009-05-08T10:06:00.000-04:00

Morning ladies amd gents. It's been pretty rainy and dreary for the past week but it really hasn't bothered me too much. I do enjoy the bit of sun we got this morning. I stood on my porch for a few minutes and just felt it on my skin. I so should've stayed living in California. But I don't think the sunshine will last because it seems to be getting cloudy again. *le sigh*

So this weekend is Mother's Days which truth be told I think moms should be celebrated all year round cause let's face it moms rock and tend to sacrifice so much for their children. And yes I know some moms aren't the best, some never acted like moms (mine tends to fall here) but you know what I'm here because of this lady and so are you. So happy mother's day to all you wonderful mamas. And no you don't have to have kids to be celebrated. Any woman who has taken the time to nurture and guide a child, well you should be thanked and commerated too. Oh and all you pet mommies, happy mom's day to you too. So I would like the weather to be nice Sunday so we can have a cookout but I won't hold my breath.

Well today's Friday and I'm excited. Not only cause it's Friday but because I get to do prom makeup for one of the girls I know. Also I get to see my baby brother all decked out. I know when I see them walking down the aisle on graduation day I'm gonna sob. Shoot I might shed a few tears tonight.

Well loves I hope everyone has a fantastic Friday and if I don't blog again soon have a fabulous weekend.

Ciao
Xoxo
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Why I Can't Be a Nice Guy

2009-05-04T10:30:00.000-04:00

People often mistake being nice with being weak. They see you be helpful and think it's an oppurtunity to get over. Well you know what? I'm done, quite simply tired. I am not the person to cross. I am not the one you want on your bad side. Me being nice is not a sign of weakness, no in fact me being nice in a world where so many people are jaded is a sign of me being a better person. Whenever people need me I'm here, I drop everything, rearrange my schedule and give me undivided attention. I'm always here to help people out of rut. Birthdays and holidays I always make people feel good and never forget to drop a line and wish them good wishes. But guess what when I need someone to listen to me, when I want to celebrate something important to me barely anyone is there. Now don't get me wrong I have a few great friends that drop me text just because, answer no matter what time of day it is. For these wonderful people I am grateful. Yet for the many others that can't text happy birthday or pick up the phone when I need them well those people are slowly getting eliminated. See a friendship like like any realtionship is about give and take. And well I'm tiered of giving. I'm proud of myself for cutting a lot of these people out of my life. But I have tough obstacles ahead because the others aren't so easy to walk away from. Some of them have been in my life years. Some of them I truly do love but I don't want to be taken advantage of anymore.

So there we are kiddies. Being Mrs./Mr. Nice Guy only works when the people you're nice to appreciate and are deserving of it.

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Oh Noes!!

2009-05-04T00:13:00.000-04:00

So I would like to say my weekend went according to olan but it didn't. But than again when in life does everything go as schduled? I can't complain much other than there not being enough hours in the day. I got most things I wanted done. But the things I really wanted to do I didn't. *sigh*

I stopped by 2 MAC counters because the first one I went to didn't have Secret Crush. I'm gonna review and post pics on Beauty-Whore either tomorrow or Tuesday. I also picked up Sugarrimmed Dazzleglass which will also be reviewed. I need to go back and get the Rose Fix+ I was going back and forth wheter I wanted it or not and after arriving home today from my trip to MAC I realized yeah I really want it lol. So back to MAC I go.

In other news in 3 weeks Memorial Day and with that comes our annual trip to the lake. And guess what I'm so not ready for a swimsuit ack! So I'm buying an elliptical. I'm hoping to get some Walmart/Visa giftcards for mother's day that I can use towards one. If not guess I'll have to pinch my pennies. Anywho yup I decided that a gym membership would be a loss for me since with the kids, work and my personal projects I barely have time. But with an elliptical at home I can jump on while I wait for dinner to cook etc.

Well I hope everyone had a great weekend. Be safe kiddies.

Ciao
Xoxo

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Oh Really?

2009-05-01T10:04:00.000-04:00

So it's Friday and I'm here at work. My day started off great. I was in an awesome mood. I dropped the kids off. Went to QuickStop, bought some scratchies and even won a few bucks. So I was happy enjoying my day looking forward to my weekend. Not even minding that the manager called an office meeting that'll probably take up all our lunch. Well out first paitients get here and there's an issue. An issue I assumed was addressed by the office manager weeks ago. Which mind you this appointment was not scheduled while I was out. So the manager catches and additude with me? Wtf are yiu serious? You really want to go there? This is one of the many reasons I need out of this job. He always makes these situations and just hands them over and tries to walk away. I'm not the one, I don't get paid to do his job and quite frankly I'm tired of it. I'm gonna try to move on and continue my happy day but I KNOW he'll come to me with an additude about this. And most likely signal me out at the meeting even though this in no way is my fault.

So anyways, I'm still looking forward to my weekend. I'm gonna meet up with MUA ShandraJade tomorrow for 3 hours for some one on one time. I'm super stoked. Hopefully I can get to a MAC counter this weekend at some point to pick up some Rose Fix+ And the hubby is suppose to take me to eat some seafood at some point yum! I hope everyone has a lovely weekend. And I'm gonna try to get through my day.

Ciao
Xoxo
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Just Like That

2009-04-23T13:54:00.000-04:00

So my dad left today. Didn't say bye, didn't bother speaking to me. He was at my grandna's yesterday when I went to pick Jayden up. I stuck arpund for awhile hoping he would say something. Make amends before he departed. I sat in the same room as him for 20 mins and never even looked at me.
I'm deeply saddened but what can I do? *sigh*
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Moving On

2009-04-21T13:57:00.000-04:00

As some of you know I've been a bit down for the last few days. But today I woke and have decided to just move forward. There's nothing I can do. And when things like this happen, things that are out of your control the best thing to do is try to move on and live life.

I'm happy that I have so many great people in my life, both in real life and ifriends. Thanks you all for your words, support and love. I love and appreciate you all.

I have a lot of events to look forward to. This weekend I'll be celebrating my bday with my cousins and brothers, cake and food and some Cranium lol. Possibly heading out to the club though truth be told I rather pass on that. I'm meeting 2 of my good friends for a bday lunch Sat and just plain enjoying the weather. I plan on blogging loads on Beauty-Whore also and possibly uploading a video to You Tube. In the next few weeks I'm going to get my portfolio together and on May 2nd I'll be meeting with the fabulous MUA ShandraJade. She's in the area from California and we have connected to have one on one consult. Just asking for pointers, tips and such :). I must say I'm super excited about it. Oh and I hope to have some good news workwise soon. I've only told 1 person about it cause I don't want to jinx myself lol. But everyone keep your fingers crossed and send good thoughts my way.

Xoxo

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Wow

2009-04-20T09:43:00.000-04:00

So the BS with my dad continues. We were at the pool Saturday and him and my mom came. Well he talked to my other 2 boys but not me or Orion (I can't remember if I wrote this or not). So I was like fudge this whatever. Sunday we got to leave. Everyone's in the car and we pull off. My mom says happy birthday to me and my dad says nothing. Throughout the whole trip he doesn't speak to me or anything. Fine, I just try to ignore it. We finally get to my gma's where me & Dave left our cars. After being there 10 mins my mom says my dad wants to get his things from my house cause he's going to a hotel. Alrighty then, like I never said he had to leave. Dave takes him and he gets his things and leaves. Oh and to top it off my mom asks for his flight paper which in my mind means he plans on leaving without saying a word to me. Nice dad, way to go. Nevermind I never got to spend a birthday with you or the fact that we've seen each other a handfull of times since I first met you when I was 13. Forget the fact that we have to make up for much time loss already. Just go ahead and act ignorant. Go ahead and be an asshole. Who cares if you see your daughter or grandkids again, not you I guess.

I was so excited all this time for this and for what? To be disappointed, let down and hurt. All on my birthday!! If I don't speak to my dad ever again it wil hurt. But if he can't deal with my son's behavior, the behavior of an average 6 year old. If my son bothers him so much he can plain cast him aside, hurt him, then he can't deal with me. And it's with a heart full of pain that I say this sadly I think will be the last time I see my dad.

Ciao
Xoxo

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Happy Birthday to Me

2009-04-19T08:48:00.000-04:00

Today's my bday, yay! I have had an eventfull weekend. Too bad I can't say it was all good but I overcame. As most of you know my dad was coming from California for my bday. Well he got here Wednrsday in the wee hours of the morning and he bought me a car. A 05 Imapala. Man was I like happy! Well we had this trip planned to Niagara Falls for this weekend. Why does he go and invite my mom? Like wtf? Ok so whatever.

We get here and we're having a good time. We go to eat dinner. And at some point Orion was sorta playing with his food. Well my dad flipped was talking shit and even walked off without us. Then the next morning him and my mom got up had breakfast and went sightseeing without us. And my mom comes all well he's mad about Orion. Well you know what fuck that! Orion is 6 and has ADHD along with other little things. If that bothers him so much that he doesn't want to be around my son well it sucks to be him. That's my son and at the end of the day he comes before everyone, including my dad. I have cried everyday because of this. As I type this tears are forming in my eyes. I was fuming and was even trying to rent a car to leave yesterday. But I took a deep breath and made the best if it for my kids. We went to see several attractions and swimming in the pool. Last night we went to the Hard Rock Cafe and then walked across the street to the falls. Which were lit up with colors. So beautiful!

We're now gonna eat breakfast to head off at 10. I have't spoken to my father since Friday even though we've been in the elevator together and passed each othert in the hotel. I don't look forward to being in a car with him for 7 hours. And to be honest I doubt I'll talk to him before he leaves Thursday morning. As far as the car I could car less he can take it and give it to someone else. Yes I might be acting childish but that's my son. And if my son bothers him so much than I bother him.

So yeah Happy Birthday to me....
Xoxo

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Tired....

2009-04-16T15:52:00.002-04:00

Yeah folks I'm struggling with the sleep again. I barely sleep at night, sometimes if I'm lucky I get about 5 hours in. So here I am tired and sleepy and bored. Not a good combination. I tried to sleep in abit tis morning. My dad was going to go and run some errands with my mom but..... Let me just tell you.

My dad woke up early and by 8 he was out the door, the knocked and came back. Then he said he couldn't find his key. So it was in and out for a few. And well the way my apartment is layed out my bedroom is the way in and out the house. So now I'm up and he's thinking he locked the key in the trunk of the car. But we look through all his things just in case. Nada. My aunt comes over with this hanger to try to pop the lock (the woman has skills popping locks and no she's not a car theif). So we're there a few minutes and thus far no luck. The security guard from the hospital across the street from us parks and comes over. After seeing what my aunt is working with he walks back to the car and gets one of those jimmy thingies. So he's trying to work the lock and nada. Here comes my aunt and says can I see that. Pop in like 2 minutes, not even. Now there's no level to pop the trunk though. Okk so we pull donw thw back seat and my cousin Tito climbs in and pops the trunk. Guess what? No keys!!!! I couldn't believe it. Now they decided to go to Chevy and just get a key made which if we're lucky will run us like $80. Well as my aunt and dad are loading the kids into the other car and getting ready to leave I decide to stay behind cause I had to leave to work soon. I go back into the room and decide to try my luck looking for the key. I walk to the closet and look down and don't you know that sucka was right there!!! I ran out and stopped them before they left.

So yeah I lost out on sleep all cause this key lol. Oh well at least we found it and had a good laugh.

Ciao

Not Enough Time....

2009-04-13T10:04:00.002-04:00

I swear I need to own like some device that stops time or something. I feel like everytime I'm getting motivated, in my niche or just accomplishing things time runs out in the day. Like this long weekend, I thought I would have extra time to do so much. Wrong! It just slipped by like always. I did however manage post to Beauty-Whore, but it wasn't as much as I would've liked to. Somehow all these pics of looks I did and edited disappeared. I just can't win. But it did feel good to post. Withthat being said anyone have any products they would like to see reviewed, swatched, etc? I think I've been doing an ok job of posting here. Now LJ and my Tumblr, not so good. Which is funny because Tumblr was the only thing I was posting to at least once a day. Welp I guess I can't win them all.

I'm behind on my personal portfolio though. Blah, I got yhe camera I wanted and some girls volunteered (of course lol) but I need to block out at least half a day if not more to do this. I know I'm going to need to break it up into possibly 3 days since I will be doing makeup and taking the pictures all by myself. If any of you sexay ladies want to help me out let me know. I'll do the makeup free of charge and give you copies of the pics on a cd or if you'd like print. I have a few looks planned in my head but also want to try to some end avant gard stuff. I'm excited!!

Oh by the way, we're openig the beauty forums at beauty-whore again in the summer. And to kick things off we're gonna be giving away a makeup prize for the person that refers that most people to join. Anyone who was around for the forums remembers how much fun they were and a great way to share beauty tips. Sstayed tune for that. Also I know I owe people a new You Tube video, well it's coming..... eventually lol.

I'm off to get to work. Hope everyone had a fabulous weekend.

Ciao
xoxo

When It Comes To The Heart....

2009-04-08T10:09:00.003-04:00

When dealing with the heart we often make foolish decesions that one would've never made otherwise. I sat down and thought about exs and past adventures in romanace I have had and man did I act out of character so many times. Why is it when one is in love there are things you know will break your heart, you know you'll get hurt and yet one goes down that path anyways? Your brain screams NO!!! But your heart, well that says yes in every way possible. And for some odd reason common sense is forgotten and we listen to our hearts even though the negative outweighs the positive. I guess when they said a fool in love that wasn't too far from the truth.

Now don't get me wrong there are times that following your heart is a good thing. When going agaisnt all odds leads to the ultimate prize, a true and lasting love. There are times when one must trudge on no matter what your mind or people say. But in these cases I think for the most part your mind and heart are on the same page (well for the most part). The negatives and postives are about neck in neck if not tipping ore towards positive. But even then heartbreak can be right around the corner.

With all that being said it's amazing how much the heart can endure. It breaks, aches and feels like you'll never love again at times. Yet at the oppurtunity of true love it's beating again and ready to go through all the pain and agony again.

Marry Me Juliet...

2009-04-07T13:43:00.002-04:00

Oh noes why oh why am I singing Miley Cirus(sp) songs?!!? I really have tried to not get sucked in by them but it seems that this little Hanna Montana chick is EVERYWHERE. And worst yet they play here music everywhere. I do admit the songs are a bit catchy after hearing them for awhile but NO DAMMIT I don't need them stuck in my head. SMH

So here it is another dreaded Tuesday and I'm back at this job. *le sigh* How I wish someone would call me, interview and offer me a postion where I can be more productive and not waste my talents away like today. I've been applying places but truth be told a few looked like scams. I was redirected to 3rd parties sites to "apply" meanwhile they kept trying to get me to sign up for own your own business shit. Yeah...... Needless to say I'm not falling for that.

Speaking of work from home business. Last month an old friend I grew up with found me from the newspaper and contacted me. At first I was all aww this is nice. Well after speaking for 10 or so minutes she starts this pitch about her workf rom home business and how it could be a gret oppurtunity. So I was like um ok I hear you out but that sorts of things are not my thing really. Now her company sounds all fine and dandy but again I'm just a bit skeptical about it all. Well anyways this chick keeps calling me and it's not to like psark our friendship back it's more like pitches and shit. So lame. I mean come on if all I am to you is a way to make money keep it moving you know. Like she texted and said let's go to Starbucks this weekend, so I was like I'm hella busy but if I can break free for an hour I'm there. She replies great that way we can talk about oppurtunities I have for you. Wow, not that way we can catch up, nope that way we can talk business. Yeah I'm too through.

My birthday is in 12 days and guess what?? I'm excited!! I'm happy and no I might not be partying it up but I'll be with people that truly love me and care for me =)

Well babes I'm off to endure the next 5 hours.
Ciao

Labels....

2009-04-02T16:27:00.002-04:00

Since when has it become so important to label everyone/everything? Why can being yourself not be enough? Now you have to be catorgorized too. If a girl likes to keep her looks up and be pampered she's a diva/high maintanence. If she happens to not want to be prissy and perfers sneakers to pumps she's a tomboy or automatically written off as a lesbian. If a woman is career focused she's wrong but if she's a stay at home mom that's also frowned upon. If you don't sleep around you're a prude but the minute people know you have a sex life and well now you're a whore.

Are all these labels necessary? Does there really have to be so many negative tags to add to women (and yes I am aware men get labled too but not like women). And the thing is a lot of times it's us women doing this to each other. What happened to one being oneself and being able to be happy? I personally could care less what anyone catorgorizes me as but I still find it sad that it's done.

UGH

2009-03-28T12:06:00.002-04:00

I know I just posted but I swear I'm just beyond words on how upset I am that creativity exscapes me over and over. When Iwas laying in bed all lazy earlier I had these ideas I wanted jot down. The minute I opened up my planner, bam I'm lost, clueless.

So tell me what you do to get your spark back. I've never been in a rut for so long before. I'm beyond frustrated.

Oh and I need to get back to working out. It's getting wamer and warmer and I need to get smaller and smaller.

2009-03-28T11:39:00.003-04:00

Morning all. I'm here again, staring at my macbook like O_O I have so much I need to do and so much I want to do but yet everytime I sit here it's like it all exscapes me. But I plan on pushing through it. Yup I'm determined to. So today after I run some errands and go to Barnes & Noble I will sit and edit and uplaod and write drafts and all that other stuff =)

WEll the birthday is coming up and I"m getting a bit more excited. Just a BIT. I'm not getting my hopes up or anything but I'm am planning on having a decent time. Don't know what I"m doing but I know it'll be fun. Everyone keeps asking what I want for my birthday and honestly I'm the kind of person that appreciates anything I get. Like seriously you can grab a piece of paper and fold it in half and draw a stick figure on it and I'll love it lol. But presents are nice too so here's a list of what I like/want:

Gift Certificates to:

Apple (yeah I Want no I NEED an ipod touch lol)

Victoria Secret

MAC

Sephora

Barnes & Noble

Any resturant/food place but McDonald's or Crackel Barrel

Best Buy (gotta get some movies and DS Games)

Quite honestly all I want is to spend a nice bday with my friends and family. My dad is suppose to come on from California and I'm so excited because I haven't spent a birthday with him since I was like 3. So I guess if he does make it in that'll be all I need for my birthday.

Well I'm gonna watch Keeping Up With the Kardashians for a bit and then I'm off. Hope everyone has a great weekend.

Ciao

Random Much??

2009-03-22T21:14:00.002-04:00

Wel since I can't seem to get organized for the life of me I'll just be random with it. I guess that's why I've been posting t my Tumlr more than anything else. Cause I can can post random snipets here and there. Where I feel with this and LJ I have to be organized and on topic. Eh whatever it is here I am posting because I said I would do so more.

Weekend was great even if it went rather fast but they always do. Yesterday was Orion and Ruby's birthday. I gave them their presents, we went to eat at SOnic for the first time lol, hit the mall and went to Dave & Busters. They had so much fun and whe we left we went to my abuela's house for cake and icecream. They were both super happy and I was super tired by the end of the night. So needless to say I couldn't post to Beauty-Whore or You Tube last night. Today I was quite lazy for the most part and then had to run errands, so another day without posting blah. I will soon... I promise. I went into Ross today to find a curling iron and walked out with a new dog bed for Dallas & Star, 2 dresses for Star, a dog bowel and carrier. And you guessed it I walked out woth NO curling iron. Oh well I'll get one eventually.

Back to work tomorrow..... yeah that's all I'm going to say about that. I have been putting apps and resumes in so many places but still nothing. I'm getting a bit down on this whole job hunting thing. Anywho I guess the right job will find me sooner or later.

Well loves I'm gonna relax and enjoy these last few hours of my Sunday. Hope everyone ahd a great weekend. Ciao

xoxo

Why Hello....

2009-03-19T14:01:00.003-04:00

Yes it's been awhile. Yes I know I said I would update more frequently. No, I haven't. Quite honestly I love to blog but have just been eh about it. I mean I have been sick on and off so that's a contribution but as I stated before I have just been backing away from the inet. I don't know it just has become blah to me. I go days without logging on AIM, somrtimes I don't Tweet *gasp*. I love to write for Beauty-Whore and yet I find myself shying away from that, shoot I've been MIA there for like a month and some change. I feel like my crativity has been sucked outta me so I guess that puts me in a "rut". I do post random things to my Tumblr almost daily but again that's random and has no structure. So I have made it a goal to post at least every other day, wheter it's to BW, here or upload a You Tube video (which I have 2 to edit & post since last month some time). I hope to keep it up and get my blogging on again lol.

In other news the middle child turns 6 on Saturday. I swear these kids are just rushing to get old. We're gonna take him to Dave & Busters and have a little family get together at my grandma's afterwards. Oh my cousin's bday is the same day (yes the one I should be able to claim on my taxes). Neither one knows what we're doing so I thin they'll be pleasantly surprised. My bday is a month away and I have no clue what I'm doing. And to be quite honest I have no excitment for it nor am I looking froward to it. My friends suck for the most part and I'm sure anything plannd will end up with people no showing, flaking and canceling for the dumbest reasons. There are the few I can always count on but I just don't want to do anything to be honest.

Well darlings I'm gonna go work and try to endure the rest of the day with McLazy. Ciao

xoxo

Been A Minute...

2009-03-09T22:47:00.002-04:00

Whew I hadn't realize how long it's been since I blogged. I mean I knew it was some time but... wow. Anyways I won't make excuses for why I haven't I just go through phases which I'm sure we all do. Been working and keeping occupied. So a bit of a recap I guess...

I purchased a DSLR and love it. Altough I'm scared to mess it up at times lol. anyone with good links send them my way. I've taken loads of pics justhave to edit and upload them to FlickR. I plan on doing so this weekend. Also finally got my BB Curve. I lurves it by the way.

The bday is a little over a month away and I have nothing planned =( I don't know I'm just not really excited or anything, well as of now anyways. Maybe it'll change.

Oh another reason for the lack of post is lack of sleep. Yup my sleep has sucked ass in the past 2 months. So not cool. I feel like I've been functioning at like 80% these past few weeks.

Ok so this was just a I'm here and alive post. I promise to update more and not so scattered.

xoxo

Not Everyone Should Own Pets

2009-02-11T09:07:00.002-05:00

But yet some of those that shouldn't do. It saddens me when I watch the animal rescue on Animal Planet and these animals are so badly treated. If you can't keep your pet please just give it up. Why do these people want to hold on to these animals if they can't or don't want to care for them? I mean I love my dogs but if the day ever came that I couldn't afford to keep them I would find a good home for them no matter how much it breaks my heart.

Well today as I was driving to work I was at a stop sign waiting to turn. As I'm sitting there this guy is walking a pitbull puppy. The puppy looked about 5 months or so. So everytime the puppy stopped to sniff his surroundings (which is what dogs do) the guy would yank the leash so hard the puppy was lifted off the ground and moved about 2 feet forward. I was like wtf?! At first I thought he just pulled harder than he intended to but he did it 3 more times while I was sitting at the stop sign. I wanted to get out and scream at him. I mean when I walk my dogs Dallas tends to linger sometimes longer than he has to but I just gently tug at the leash and say come on. Dogs sniff out their surroundings, they mark their territory, that's their nature. Yes it's annoying at times when I'm in a hurry that Dallas wants to sniff and mark every tree on our walk but I could never yank him a foot off the floor to get him to move. I wonder what people think when they do things like this. Would they want someone to yank them up if they stopped to look at a house or something?

Ok so I'm ranting but I get so ticked off at these people. Animals are like humans, they feel, they hurt, etc. Just can't they can't say, "Yo stop yanking meoff the ground." Doesn't mean they like it. But yet even though some animals are abused and mistreated they stay loyal to their owners and have that uncondition love for them. More reason I think to treat them right.

Weekend Recap

2009-02-09T15:37:00.002-05:00

Had a fabulous weekend despite being a bit under the weather. I started to feel sick and coughing but I started taking vitamin c halls and loads of juice. I chilled with Corey and Burritos on Friday, good times as always. Saturday I went and saw the Acura. It is soooooo smexy. I so want it. Now it's a matter of selling my Honda to get the money I need to buy it. I hope he still has it by the time I sell my car.

Went to see Coraline with Orion and Sonny Saturday. It was great! I loved it. I wanna see it again. They did an amazing job with the effects and overall look of the movie. A lot of movies are coming out in 3D. Disney/Pixar has one that looks cute coming out in Spring. And there's one coming out in September that's called 9 and looks pretty interesting. Sunday I went to Columbus with the family and just walked around, came home cooked and relaxed.

So Vday is around the corner, well right up the street and i have no clue what to get Dave or what we'll be doing if anything. I have some cards and stuff I have to mail out. But as far as el esposo... I don't know. One yar for VDay I got him his first tattoo. I'm running out of ideas. Eh I'll figure it out I guess.

I am beyond hungry right now. Didn't get a lunch break and all I had was some soup I inhaled. So needless to say I'm not the happiest camper. Oh and after all the hype I had I'm not even excited that the MAC HK collection comes out Thursday *gasp* I know. I don't know it's looking more blah to me, maybe once I see it in person.Well babes I'm off. Ciao

And The Beat Goes On...

2009-02-04T09:37:00.002-05:00

Feeling better now that I've gotten more than 4 hours of sleep last night. But even though I'm not finctiong at 100% Imust continue life as if I was. Working till 1 today, well I'm leaving at like 12:45. Picking up Orion and heading to CHOP. I probably won't be back in Trenton till about 5ish. Blah. And I tell you one thing I will NOT be cooking tonight. So pizza froo dinner it is. Between all that I have to go to the pharmacy and run other errands.

Hitting All Stars with Maria on Friday to celebrate her birthday which was on the 2nd. I'm looking forward to seeing Maria becasue it truely has been almost a year since I have. Yeah I'm a bad friend. And not to mentio that All Stars has the best shrimp quesadillas eva!! Yum.

Other than that I'm just trying to get back on track with writing and posting since I was out of it for awhile. I actually have photos cropped and ready to load all I have to do is upload them and type up what I used, if I can remember. I also want to make time to work on my scrapbook. I realized the other night while twitting that I haven't touched it in months. So yeah just leading a normal, boring life I guess. Other than All Stars I really am not in the mood to go out and be partying. Oh and Saturday I get to go see this Acura RSX finally. Yay, I'm ecited but not too excited becasue I don't want to get there and be disappointed.

Anywhosers I'm off to work, guess I should since that's what I'm suppose to be doing. I'm gonna be faxing my resume to a few places tonight so keep your fingers crossed for me. Ciao

Tired Much???

2009-02-01T22:29:00.003-05:00

Because I for one sure the heck am. Between me getting sick and now Jayden I haven't slept much. Last night/this morning I got maybe like 2 or 3 hours in. I was up @ 7am to get ready to go see O. Picked up my brother Josh and off we went. Well we got to the prison and Josh couldn't get in because he didn't bring proper ID. So I left him outside while I saw O.

Came home and all I wanted to do was nap but alas I was up with Jayden and ceaning a bit. He finally took a nap and as I was gonna lay down he woke up. Ugh. So yeah I'm tired.... actually I'm beyond tired. Thinking of work tomorrow has me even more tired. Why can't I just hit the lotto already??

Gonna go see this Acura Saturday and I hope it's a good car. Gotta drive out to New Brunswick but it's only about a 40 min ride so it isn't too bad. Now I need to sell my car in order to buy this Acura (if it pans out). So the hubby went and made it all shiny and purdy for me today. But he forgot to buy the for sale sign. No biggie I'll get one tomorrow.

By the way I'm looking into some digital SLRs. If anyone has any recommendations leave them here. I want one for personal use/hobby.

With that being saiad I'm off to lay down because I need to sleep.

xoxo

Selling Oneself Short

2009-01-30T11:08:00.002-05:00

As I was listening to the radio the other night a topic was bought up about woman who play down how smart they are to appeal more to men. And it really left me O_o. Why would ANYONE want to act dumb or dumber than they are to please someone? Has it really gotten to that point? I mean do men really find smart women unattractive? I for one find intelligence sexy. I could never act less intelligent or anything for that matter. If you're gonna love me you have to love ME. And what happens with these women when they end up in a serious relationship and can never be they're tru selves? Do they settle for playing dumb and having a man for the rest of their lives? It baffles me to think people are doing this. In this day and age I'm sure there's someone out there for everyone. So why settle for less? Or in other words why sell yourself short? I wonder if men find themself doing the same. With that being said i close with this. Women (and men) please don't go around pretending to be something you're not. Love is out there for all of us. And you'll find the one for you. And they'll accept you and your great IQ lol

Blah de Blah

2009-01-28T23:48:00.002-05:00

My week has been blah. Sick as a dog. Lost my voice, couldn't eat solids till today somewhat. Lost 4 lbs since Friday as a result. Other thatn seeing my Uncle O on Saturday nothing has gone my way really. And I'm not gonna get into it cause I just want to push it away. But alas today is Wednesday aout 10 minutes away from Thursday and I couldn't be happier. I want the weekend here. I want to sleep in late and I want some pancakes!!! lol random I know.

I get to see O this Sunday too. I'm so excited and sad cause I know he'll be transfered to the jail in Dallas, PA soon and that's a little over 2 hours from here. I'll go see him but just not as easily as I can now. *le sigh*

Was looking at some digital SLRs on Friday and I want one so bad. But alas I don't think the budget allows it. I need to sell my car and get a better one. That's #1 on the list. I'm actually gonna check out anAcura RSX sometime next week. I'm uber excited cause it's hella sexy lol. So keep your fingers crossed for me.

I'm off to bed cause I'm super tired and I'm sure when I read this tomorrow it's gonna be me rambling and random.

Internent Liars..Gasp People Lie??

2009-01-18T16:14:00.003-05:00

It has come to my attention there many people deal with internet drama. And not like just a he said she said but some people have battles that drag out for years. I don't get this and made a video about it that I'll be posting to You Tube tonight. Why do people insist on having any kid of drama in their life yet alone internet drama? I mean shoot I have barely enough time for me yet alone to spend beefing with someone that's millions of miles away. And it's not only a female thing. Guys are just as quick to get caught up in this or create drama themselves. Like if they see a girl online and think she's fly, they'll approach with their G and be all dayum baby. Start iming and dming and all that stuff but the moment the female says hey not interested they want to post tweets, bulletins, blogs what have you that this chick is a snob and not all that. Really is that necessary?

People it's the internet come on for the love of Frosty can we find better things to do? Like who has the time and effort to get dragged into this? What do these people do for a living that allows them so much free time to sit in a computer all day and just casue problems? I think for the most part these people are trying to make a name for themself, get their 5 seconds of inet fame and let's face it negative stuff spreads faster than the positive. But it really is sad, well at least to me. It's not a good look to have your named involved in any drama yet alone some petty inent stuff. And what's worse there are people out there draggin it out, long after the party they are attacking has ignored them and stopped responding. NO LIFE.... seriously.

Oh and one more thing (I know it's gettig long). Can someone explain to me why anyone would want to steal another person's identity? Or just make up lies that others around you KNOW are lies but you continue to do so. Why create this "online" person that isn't anything like you? It's amazing how people steal pics and claim that it's them or the items in the pics are theirs. It's hilarious how some go on about buying expensive items and going to the best clubs/parties/resturants/stores etc when in reality they've only seen these things or places in pictures. When will these people accept themselves and just stop the lieing and stealing?? I mean I want loads of things I can't have but you don't see me lieing that I got it. I'm me, take me as I am or leave me alone. Some people need to be taught that.

Life is What You Make It....

2009-01-17T13:48:00.002-05:00

True but what happens when you try your hardest to make it a certain way only to fail? What happens when your best just isn't enough? I have big goals in life. I have dreams I intend on keeping but at times I feel that no matter how hard I apply myself I'll fall short. I don't like feeling this way but it's just a fear I carry with me. I wish I could check it at a coat check and just walk away. Leave it there to be placed in some sort of lost and found. But alas I can't. In reality I think this fear pushes me further, makes me want things more. I don't know, I 'm sure I'm not making sense to some of you. It's hard to understand if you're not going through it.

On a positive point I'm excited that Spring is around the corner. Looking at all the Spring collections has me ready to go with the pinks and pastels lol. Nars Spring collection is very soft and pastely (is that even a word? Welp it is now), maybe a bit too light for my taste. Altough I did see a shawdow or two that I might have to try out. Which reminds me I must pick up Diorshow Iconic. I simply love Diorshow and have been meaning to try Iconic out. Has anyone ried it? Yay or nay? Tarte has some liners I want to try and I'm out of Urban Decay Primer Potion *gasp* So yeah I have a list of make up products I want, um no that I NEED lol. What collections is everyone else looking forward to?

Not Enough Hours in the Day..

2009-01-16T23:04:00.003-05:00

I have so many projects I'm working on and so much with life in general I feel like the hours just slip away. Between work and my domestic diva duties I barely have time for my personal projects. I swear even while I dream I'm doing things I should've accomplished in my waking hours. *le sigh* Currently I'm working with my buddy Stacey on her website Beauty-Whore.com. I love posting and writing reviews but at times I feel like I don't have time to, I mean I have the ideas, I do the make up and use the products but just can't sit and blog/post. This week I've been pretty active but I have pics to edit and post from yesterday that I haven't touched. Perhaps tomorrow as I work at the real estate office and have peace and quiet. I'm also trying to decide what products I want to review in the upcoming weeks and am having a hard tme deciding there's just so much out there and not enough dinero lol. I know for sure I want to buy some eyeshadows from www.limecrimemakeup.com they're colors look so bright and vibrant. I've been so excited for the MAC Hello Kitty collection but now I don't think I'm gonna purchase much from it. Then again let's wait till I see everything in person. Smashbox has a bronzer I want to try and I never did get around to trying their Photofinish primer. See so many choices what's a girl to do. Anywho I'll most likely post my product reviews at BW and some of my looks here so stay tuned. So check www.beauty-whore.com often for updates.

I also have loads of personal things going on. I'm trying to land more make up gigs and am in the process of getting a site specifically for it, building my portfolio, possibly designing a logo and getting my business cards together. I'm hoping to have everything up and running my the end of March. Oh and I'll be vlogging on You Tube, no not make up tutorials (well maybe a couple) but just me speaking on random topics. I'll be posting a new video by Sunday. I did one video so far and enjoyed it. I won't say I'll post once a week becasue I barely have time for anything but perhaps bi-weekly.

I know I take on a lot but I've always been this way. I love make up and so BW is great for me and starting my own business has always been a dream of mine. I have a lot going on with the kids but hopefully I'll be able to accomplish everything I want in due time.

2 EOTDs

2009-01-12T22:39:00.003-05:00

These are 2 Eye of The Day sets I'm working on for http//:beauty-whore.com. Sorry for the picture quality isn't the greatest. I need to buy myself a better camera =( It's one of the reason I haven't started to put my portfolio together. I'm gonna be attempting the green one again. I want to add to it.

Allow Me to Grace These Pages...

2009-01-12T21:19:00.003-05:00

So I have a Live Journal and I love it but have decided to come over here and start a blog spot. I basically am gonna keep my real personal details in LJ and keep this more as a creative outlet. I'll post my makeup looks, things I write etc here.

With that being said I think my creativity has left me... =( I sit and try to write and go blank. I sat here thinking of a name for here and my business cards for like 3 days only to draw nada. I know we go through these phases but it's becoming quite annoying. I haven't written anything in quite some time. Ihaven't taken pics and edited and played with them in a longer time. I feel like I haven't done anything creative in forever. What if anything inspires you?

Winner's Circle

What to do.....

Bcak On Track

Happy Friday

Why Hello There....

Personal Space

Random Rant

Time Flies...

Weekend Recap

Weekend is Here :)

Why I Can't Be a Nice Guy

Oh Noes!!

Oh Really?

Just Like That

Moving On

Wow

Happy Birthday to Me

Tired....

Not Enough Time....

When It Comes To The Heart....

Marry Me Juliet...

Labels....

UGH

Random Much??

Why Hello....

Been A Minute...

Not Everyone Should Own Pets

Weekend Recap

And The Beat Goes On...

Tired Much???

Selling Oneself Short

Blah de Blah

Internent Liars..*Gasp* People Lie??

Life is What You Make It....

Not Enough Hours in the Day..

2 EOTDs

Allow Me to Grace These Pages...

Internent Liars..Gasp People Lie??